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- DMC -

Published: Apr 19th 1999

The Devil May Care 4.
The Devil May Care

As far as the football is concerned we have witnessed some epic games recently
and none more so than last Wednesday night at Villa Park. We have always
enjoyed our semis in Aston but last week those of us who were lucky enough
to have been present will never forget it. The match had everything, in
fact if Hollywood had offered it as a script every single one of us would
have told them to piss off, it would surely be too far fetched even for
Hollywood. But it happened.

It was a night which tested our throats to the full and those of us
who had to speak to anyone the day after would have left them in no doubt
of our allegiance so croaky were the old vocal cords. "You sound like
a frog" someone told me, it was only then that this person was made
party to the truth. Never before did they know of my interest in football
never mind my fanaticism towards United, but on Thursday there was no hiding
place. Everybody knew.

And wasn't it funny walking out of Villa Park through the hoards of
Arse trying desperately to keep a straight face when it was plainly impossible!
Safety in numbers was called for then or a single Red would have been set
upon without mercy.

And in Manchester in the pubs apparently it was pandemonium. In one
of the pubs noted for it's sobriety if that's not a contradiction there
was mayhem when that goal was scored. Never before had scenes of such joy
been witnessed in this normally sedate establishment. It's reported that
the bonding that went on there that night could see several millennium

So we have reached the first Final, in fact the last Final at the Wemberly
we know. The last Final of the millennium. Surely right and fitting that
the record winners of the FA Cup will be the final name on that famous
old trophy before the year 2000. Let's bug the whole of the rest of football
and do this for posterity.

We are all wondering what will happen in Turin. One thing's for sure
the whole of the rest of Italy will be willing us to win so that they can
have a laugh at the Old Lady. Juve are the Italian United - no-one else
likes them, everyone else hates them. That doesn't mean to say we have
anything in common - they are still a bunch of barcodes after all.

So what of the European Cup? Again, how right and fitting that the name
of Manchester United should be enscribed as the first team ever to win
the trophy and have not qualified as champions. We are the Red Devils aren't
we. Why change the habits of a lifetime - buck tradition and go for it.
Who has ever told us what to do? Who has ever been able to dictate to us?

Talking of dictators, what about the BSkyB bid. Altogether now - aaaaaaaaaaah!
As I said before, no-one dictates to us if we don't want them to- no-one
- not even you Murdog.

I know there are some of you who may have misgivings about this, especially
now Martin's spouting on about not being able to afford to buy players,
putting up Season Ticket prices etc., but while he's throwing his toys
out of his cot and walking away with the ball let's consider a few facts
shall we.

What a hopeless case he is. It just goes to show what an incredible
business brain he has when as the so called head of the richest club in
the world can't quite grasp the fact that if the team are doing well the
share price will go up and thus Manchester United will make more money.

What does this astute person do - he spitefully says that because of
the naughty boys in IMUSA and SUAM, Manchester United can't now afford
to buy players in the summer. Perhaps someone a little closer than me to
Martin would like to remind him of that well known saying about cutting
one's nose off to spite one's face! As the Sergeant said to the Corporal
in "It Ain't Half Hot Mum", "stupid boy."

This is MR BUSINESS BRAIN 1999 who is running our club. A man who would
deny the single most important man in Manchester United over the last decade,
namely the Wizard Fergie, the opportunity to invest in the team. Well done
Martin you really are a superb servant of our club. You really do have
the best interests of Manchester United at heart - like f**k you do.

He's not just a touch mad that the share price has fallen dramatically,
that he's lost millions,is he? If he actually took time to think about
it, those nice people at IMUSA and SUAM have actually put him on the right
path to make millions more. But he's too bitter to see it so why doesn't
he go and join City where he'd be more than welcome.

Can't he even see that without the player investment over the summer
we wouldn't be in the position we are right now. Records are falling fast
for this outfit. They are about to eclipse the 1993-94 team with a bit
of luck. That team were the best I have ever seen wearing the Red shirts
and this lot are better and are hopefully about to prove it.

My advice is to buy shares now while the price is low and see your investment
grow, but the main thing is you will hold a vital stake in your club which
at the appropriate moment you can drive through Martin's heart - metaphorically
speaking of course!

We don't mean it Marty!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So we've shoved it up the Arse, ditched the Dirty Digger and all we
need to top off the month is to batter the Old Lady. Are there any scousers
out there who can give us tips on how this may be achieved?


The Devil May Care - DMC.

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